Keeping a journal–a “record”–is a big deal with Mormons. We’re told from the time we’re small that we need to keep a journal of our life. (In writing this post, I couldn’t remember exactly why this was important, so I asked Google and found just what I was looking for. Google. Where would I be without you?)
Well, I was a great journal-keeper in high school and in an effort to de-crap my life, I have been going through closets and drawers and boxes, and have stumbled upon my stash of journals. Oh man, did my teenage self write some funny stuff.
Tonight, I came across journals from EFY and Sunday school. Boyhowdy, the fun never stopped, not even in Sunday school.
Before I share this with you, I must preface it with some words from the late Spencer W. Kimball:
Your journal should contain your true self rather than a picture of you when you are “made up” for a public performance. …
Get a notebook, a journal that will last through all time, and maybe the angels may quote from it for eternity. Begin today and write in it your goings and comings, your deepest thoughts, your achievements and your failures, your associations and your triumphs, your impressions and your testimonies.
And, apparently, your best jokes. From one of my Sunday school journals, scrawled in sparkly-blue gelly roll pen (remember those?) on a page of its own, I wrote this:
Oh my gosh! I am sooooooo bored!!! It’s like sitting through a meeting where Ben Stein is the featured speaker!
I heard a joke yesterday…Let’s see if I remember it…
girl: if you were my husband, I’d put arsenic in your coffee.
guy: If I were your husband, I’d drink it!
Ha ha ha
I hope the angels quote that one, and my posterity, too because that is a funny joke. Especially since its written in one of the journals distributed by the church. You know the purple one with the temple on the front and a little flower at the top of each page? Yeah, That one. (I hope I wrote it during a lesson on eternal marriage. I think the angels would really get a kick out of that.)
Ah, my true self recorded on glossy, flowery paper in sparkly-blue teenage scrawl.
Yep. I am going to heaven.