The Luxury of Laziness, or, Why I Love The Internet

I’m cleaning up my (ancient, crammed-with-files) computer and have come across all sorts of writing I’ve done in and out of class. This one was written July 12 when I was, quite evidently, in a very sour mood. I’m posting it because I think it’s funny. Just keep in mind that while I really do loooove having internet available to me 24/7, the only time I ever used the internet as much as this would have you believe was as a student with a big paper to write. Also, I loooove to exaggeraaaaate.

And finally, I do not employ profanities so liberally except in writing. Although, that day may have been an exception.

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I wrote this yesterday and apparently I was in quite a sour mood. That might be because I had just returned from a wonderful weekend in the amazing land of Syria. Or it might be that the computer lab closed at 1 instead of 3 and so I had to go all the way back home to get my computer so I could check email and facebook and the goingson of the outside world. I did, however, have the chance to glance at my bank account which showed a $20 ATM fee. I came back to school with my laptop but the *cussword* wireless is a piece of *cussword* and I couldn’t do anything with it anyway. Oh, and before I even went to use the internet I was telling some of the people I traveled with about the ATM fee and how they now owed me some bucks since I withdrew the money to cover the entire cost of our stay at the hostel and one of my fellow students butted in and told me to ‘let it go.’ Um, Bull*cussword* I’m going to ‘let it go’. I sure don’t have have 20 USD to put down for a *cussword* ATM fee. Why the *cussword* are you in my business anyway? I sure don’t remember you riding with us in the taxi that overcharged us or withdrawing money from the ATM that slapped me with the fee. Tell me to let it go! GRRR! This place is so stupid!

It’s not, really (yes it is). I actually had a really good day and eventually did find a place with FREE wi-fi and no facebook block. It wasn’t fast enough to download the TAL podcast or to upload any pictures, but I surfed the New York Times AND alJazeera. I also went to the grocery store and understood every word the grocer said to me. All three of them, but HEY. Small victories and all that. Also, he thought I was Russian and pretty much everyone else thinks I’m German or French. I’m not sure what to think of that.

SO, even though it sounds like I’m having a terrible time in Jordan and like I would rather be back in 8AM Intro to Economics than this stupid place, it is not really case. I’m just having trouble adjusting to all this character-building. Being poor is just so hard!

But otherwise, life is good.
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Gah. I hate that I can no longer afford luxuries like INTERNET and DONUTS and LAZINESS. It’s terrible! Absolutely dreadful. I don’t recommend it—don’t even even try it. Not even for two months. Especially not for two months.

But who even knew laziness was a luxury? Who even knew that there would come a time that I would not have high-speed internet available to use the second I thought to check facebook? WHO KNEW? And why did they not tell me! And whyyyyy is it soooo haaaarddd?

I hate not surfing the New York Times Most Popular articles.
I hate not being able to check my GoogleReader every 8 and a ½ minutes, and not being able to check my email every 2.
I hate not being able to have Facebook open between my Reader and my NYT columns.
I hate not being able to compose blog entries right there on Blogger. Or emails right there on Gmail.
I hate having to walk two blocks to a grocery store with no Ice cream, Lettuce, or Naked.
I hate that when it comes time to wash my clothes, I have to plug in the machine, fill it—bucket by bucket—with water, wait for it to finish, put in the spin cycle and then still have to wait overnight for my clothes to dry because apparently no one invented the Dryer!
I hate not having a Brita pitcher. Pitcher, I miss yooooooou!!
I hate not being able to waste time on YouTube.
I hate not having time to waste.
I hate my morning class on Sunday and Monday.
I hate teachers who reteach useless things. USELESS, I say!
I hate that all the people honk at me as they drive by.
I hate the dry heat.
I hate the hills.
I hate the smell of moth balls and cannot figure out why the hell my building smells like them.
I hate taking taxis everywhere.
I hate that I live so far away from everywhere.
I hate that the exchange rate makes everything 43% more expensive.
I hate that I don’t have a way of generating income.
I hate not being able to wash my face and dishes in hot water—or even lukewarm.
I hate that I can’t check out books from the university library.
I hate that no one can check out books from the university library.
I hate that I can’t check out books from the university library.
I hate the university library calls itself a library when it is so clearly NOT.
I hate when stores don’t have change.
I hate when cab drivers don’t have change.
I hate that everyone in Jordan wants change even though the monetary system in Jordan does not lend itself to so much change.
I hate that the internet connection everywhere is too slow to upload pictures.
I hate that the university wireless connection doesn’t load facebook.
I hate not having 24-hour access to facebook.
I hate not getting the This American Life podcast downloaded directly to iTunes every week.
I hate that there isn’t an internet connection in this COUNTRY fast enough to download it.
I hate that Amman is so lame.
There’s not even a beach!

Grrrrrrrr.

PS I’d just like to say for the record that I never bought donuts. In fact, I would often scold my roommates for buying them because while the guilt of buying AND eating a donut was sufficient to keep me from indulging, free donuts on my kitchen table were not to be passed up. And that donut shop across the street from the university with the buy 2 get 1 free deal is just a ten-minute walk, and there aren’t even any hills.
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So there you have it. Me on a bad day in Amman. I’d like to add that I’m not sure about the library thing. There were very few books in the collection and none I was interested in checking out, so I never knew for sure if there was a No Check-Out policy (though there probably was. Stupid place.). But it was what I heard from several of my fellow students.

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1 comment

  1. I'm not really stalking you, I just glanced through your post-titles and found this one amusing. You're such a whiner, hahaha, but it's cool yo I do it all the time, especially in real life, when you're around to tell me “wah wah why is my life so harrrd?” heeheehee 😛